Hiding out
by M. F. Luder
He closes the door after him, sighing as he does so. Summer's still there, in Seth's room. They are still in there and Ryan's here, in the pool house.
Ryan sits down on the bed, taking off his shoes. He runs one hand through his hair, feeling tired and anxious all at once.
It's still early, a little after ten, and he knows they'll be there for at least another hour. Not knowing what else to do, Ryan reaches for his backpack and gets out his notebook. History homework needs to get done.
One hour later, like clockwork, Ryan hears the engine of Summer's BMW as she drives off.
He frowns, standing up. He walks to the French doors, pushing the curtains to the side with his fingers, peering outside. The lights in the main bedroom are turned off, probably have been for the last half an hour or so.
Kirsten must have read for a while before going to bed. Sandy's different. He would have turned in for the night as soon as possible, hoping to get up early and catch a wave before work. Unless they decided to get romantic, of course, in which case they would still fall asleep before midnight.
Seth's light, on the other hand, is still on. Ryan waits for a moment, eyes fixed on the window on the second floor, right side. He knows Seth and Seth's nothing if not predictable. Ryan only has to wait ten more minutes before the light is turned off. Ryan grins.
He should be tired, he was an hour ago, but his mood has changed drastically. He feels jumpy, in need to burn some energy, some steam -- he needs to get laid.
Walking to the dresser, Ryan rummages under the underwear. There are two boxes there, hidden away from prying eyes, hidden as much as one can in a pool house.
Rosa has never founded it, Ryan would have known. Comments would have been made, questions would have been asked. So, no, it's still a secret. Ryan likes it like that.
He gets out two pieces of clothing from one of the boxes, pushing it back to the corner of the drawer, under the boxers.
He throws the clothing on the bed before taking of his shirt, and Ryan pauses for a moment. He thinks about it, eyes shifting to the door, unlocked.
He's smarter than this, so he walks to it and locks it. It might not give him much time, Ryan doesn't usually use the lock, why would he now? But at least, he thinks, it'll give him enough time to hide the clothing, push it under the bed or behind a pillow. Something. That's more than enough, really.
He finishes taking his clothes off and starts putting on his secret attire. An attire, Ryan has to admit, that's more like himself than anything else he usually wears.
He sits down on the edge of the bed to tie the shoelaces of his usual black shoes before running a hand down his pant leg, the black leather soft under his fingertips.
Standing up, Ryan walks to the four-foot mirror standing against the wall as he inspects himself.
The leather pants look great on him, he knows as he grins, turning to the side, seeing the outline of his ass tightly covered by the fabric. The blue electric shirt that hugs his chest and abdomen like a second skin, leaving very little to the imagination, was a good choice to go with the pants.
He looks good to go, with only his hair needing some attention.
His usual dry look of blondish hair is very straight, perfect for Harbor and the day, but for the night, for the little escapades Ryan enjoys so much, he'd rather slick it to the back.
Placing a pinch of gel in his hands, he rubs them together and then runs his hands through his hair, looking almost naturally wet as his hair is pushed back.
Ryan checks his watch. Close to midnight, but for others, on the other side of Newport, the night is barely starting, and Ryan knows just the place.
He makes his way out of the pool house and toward the garage, eyes shifting to the windows on the second floor. Both lights are out and Ryan knows the three of them are fast asleep.
He finds the key of the Range Rover with no difficulty, his eyes used to the dark by now, and he turns the engine on. Ryan knows the Cohens are not light sleepers, thank God.
Putting the car into gear, Ryan pulls out the driveway and out of the community.
The place blasts with the music and dancing as Ryan makes his way through the crowd and toward the bar.
There's no ID required for this place, lips sealed tight. One of the good things of living in the upper class of town: everyone who's a regular here wants to keep it under wraps.
That's one of things that caught Ryan's attention about this place. Minors are allowed, and everyone keeps quiet about the attendance.
Illegal? Of course, but who cares when you can get a drink and get laid at the same time.
Seeing a familiar face down the bar, with two other guys Ryan recognizes, he grins to himself and walks toward the group.
"Ryan, babe!"
The young man, green eyes that can take your breath away and black hair that's combed to the side tonight, grins. Ryan can't help but smile back. William Scott Winston III. Quite the full name, even for someone from Newport.
William's dad, as Ryan knows and has seen at the Galas every other week, owns one of the most successful Buffets in Newport, even offered Sandy a position a while back.
William, captain of the basketball team at Harbor, Class President and voted Most Popular two years in a row. William, as everyone knows him, but for Ryan and the secrecy of this place, it's just Willy.
"Willy, honey," Ryan says with a grin, standing before him. Ryan leans over and places a small peck on the boy's lips. "I didn't think I'd find you tonight."
Willy waves it off with a flourish, right hand coming back to its usual manner, bent forward as he places his elbow on the counter, smirking at Ryan seductively. "Oh, love, you have no idea. Dad's off to... somewhere, again, and mom's unconscious from Whisky, or Bourbon, or something." He giggles. "Who cares, really. It was the perfect opportunity to come here, babe, where else would I go?"
Ryan nods, leaning back, hands on either side of him. "Of course."
"So, love, what do you want tonight?"
Ryan thinks about it before smiling. "Apple margarita, of course."
"Ohhh... in the mood for something green?"
Ryan chuckles, ducking his head to the side, hand moving to his mouth. "Don't remind me."
Willy gives the order to the bartender before looking to his right, the two boys standing by his side giving him a long look.
"Oh, right," Willy says, "where are my manners? Bad, bad Willy." He chuckles. "These are--"
"I know who they are, Willy, you fruit." Ryan rolls his eyes, winking in the boys' direction. "Phil and Matt, right?" Ryan waits long enough for them to nod. "Hot couple of the month, as I've heard."
Matt blushes a darling shade of red as Phil hugs him from behind, licking Matt's ear.
"Phil!" Matt says, swatting the arm of his boyfriend.
"Matt, we have to do everything possible to keep our title," Phil says with a grin.
Ryan shakes his head. "I don't think you can do better than blowing him in a bathroom stall at Pacific, now, can you?"
Matt blushes a deeper shade of red. "You heard?"
Ryan giggles. "Oh course I heard, honey, everyone did. Well, everyone around here."
Willy nods, handing Ryan his poison for tonight. "I can't help it, darlings, I'm a sucker for romance, and blow jobs, and gossip." He sticks out his tongue as Matt glares at him. "I'm a girl, what do you expect?"
A slow song is heard through the speakers and couples get closer on the dance floor.
"Ohh... Matty, our song!"
Willy rolls his eyes as Phil drags Matt out to the dance floor by the hand. "Fags," Willy says with a grin, obviously joking. He shakes his head before turning to look at Ryan. "Don't you just hate it when couples are happy and you're fucking alone."
Ryan snorts haughtily, taking a low swallow of his margarita.
"Oh, love, him again, huh?" Willy rubs his hand on Ryan's forearm as he sighs. "I'm sorry, babe, really. He's..."
"It's nothing."
Willy rolls his eyes again as he hears Ryan's normal tone. Normal for Harbor, and daily life, but fake for this environment. "Yes, of course it is, and I know of a pier that's for sale." He squeezes Ryan's shoulder. "Whatever." His eyes shift to Matt and Phil on the dance floor, dancing close together, as are the rest of the couples. "You wanna get out of here? I'm sick of lovey-dovey guys."
Ryan nods, finishing his drink in one gulp, following Will out of the bar.
As they reach the parking lot, Will turns around, taking Ryan's hand in his and he pulls Ryan to his side.
Ryan kisses Will breathlessly, needing the contact and the attention. Needing the passion.
Will's hand moves down to Ryan's pants, covering the bulge that can't be hidden by the leather pants. Ryan groans into the kiss as Will chuckles.
"You know how hot you look in these pants, don't you? Your legs, your ass, your dick," Will breathes out in Ryan's ear, biting the earlobe playfully.
Ryan has to tighten his grip on Will's waist not to bite down on the boy's shoulder.
"Of course you do," he continues, licking the ear down to the jaw. "You love it, don't you babe, you love the attention."
Ryan doesn't say anything as he takes Will's mouth in his, his tongue scraping the other as they kiss. Eyes closed, he doesn't see the green eyes or the black hair, and Ryan presses his eyes shut forcefully. Will's here, with him, kissing him, wanting him. Will, not anyone else. Will.
When they pull apart, Will takes a step back, lips bruised from the kiss, erection visible through his tight jeans.
"Follow me," he says, smirk placed on his lips.
Ryan nods, trotting to his car as Will does the same.
They've done this before and Ryan knows the routine. Taking both cars to Will's place because it'd be too much work to get back here after leaving the Winston's home.
And so, Ryan changes gear, one hand going to the wheel as the other accommodates himself, the ride too long and too painful at the moment.
Ryan's fingers walk over the solid chest of long afternoons spent dribbling a ball, up to the perfect pecs of someone who loves to swim, to the jaw he licked only minutes ago and to the bruised mouth of hard sex.
Will takes the fingers in between his lips, sucking on them before biting on the tip.
Ryan grins, a low satiated smile as he leans over and kisses Will. Half lying on Will's chest, Ryan moves his left leg up to rub his foot against Will's right calf.
"God, you're hot."
Ryan laughs, throwing back his head, not caring about how loud the sound is in the otherwise silent house.
If they didn't wake Will's mother with their groans and moans, he won't wake her with one chuckle.
"And you're sexy as hell." Ryan tilts his head, winking. "Isn't that why we get along so good?"
"That," Will says, lifting his head from his pillow to kiss Ryan, "and we're great in the sack."
"Can't deny that, honey."
Looking down at the full body, hard body, Will grins as his eyes fall down on Ryan's feet.
"Great color," he says. "Looks very good on you."
Ryan looks down at his feet, wiggling his red painted toes and giggling as he does so. "I like the color, yeah, but I think I'll need something more pastel for this summer." He turns to look at Will. "What do you think about girlish yellow?"
Will chuckles, shaking his head.
"So," he says after a minute, as Ryan runs his finger up and down his six-pack, "what happened today to make you come out of hiding?"
Ryan swallows thickly, ducking his head.
Will sighs. "You'll have to talk about it eventually, love, you know that? I mean, I haven't seen you there in over a month. I thought you'd gone all straight on me, or something."
Ryan snorts. "That'd be the day, sure."
Will's hand moves to Ryan's chin, forcing Ryan to look at him. "It was Seth again, wasn't it? The idiot can't see beyond his dick and a girl's tits, is it?"
Ryan shakes his head, pulling away from Will's grasp but not moving from the bed. "It's not him."
"Of course it's not, love, of course. Only the boy is not going anywhere, and you're still living with him, and he still has a girlfriend, and you're still in love with him."
Ryan presses his lips together. "I'm not," he says, but his voice sounds anything but convincing.
A snort. "This isn't the first time we've fucked because of him. Don't get me wrong, sugar, you're one hot piece of ass, but I know it's not me you see when you fuck me." Will shakes his head. "Nope. I don't have brown curls, honey, or brown eyes."
No, he doesn't, Ryan knows this. But Ryan doesn't need the curls or the eyes to see Seth's face when he closes his eyes.
They don't say anything for a moment and Will starts to wonder if maybe he pushed too hard when Ryan speaks up.
"She keeps hanging around the house."
Will is no idiot and he knows perfectly well who Ryan's talking about. Summer. Yes, of course, Will has seen the bitch back with Seth in school the past week, and he thought that might be the reason why Ryan was out of the scenery. That bitch, who had more tits that she had brains, taking away Ryan's boy from him. Not lady like, that's for sure.
"I know," he says, hand petting Ryan's shoulder. "Oh, I know, babe."
Ryan shakes his head, taking a deep breath. "I'm fine, really."
Will snorts again. "You're such a lousy liar, Ryan, I have no idea how you pull off that straight persona. Babe, really, I don't believe it. And kissing that Marissa chick? Argh. I've seen pigeons with more meat than that skinny girl." He shudders. "I don't know how you pull it off."
Ryan chuckles, poking Will in the ribs. "You aren't far behind, honey, are you? You did date Missy."
Will pretends to be retching as he remembers the head cheerleader he used to have on his arm. "Argh, don't remind me."
Ryan laughs, and as the humor becomes comfortable between them again, Will speaks up.
"You will have to tell him one day."
Ryan nods, half heartily. "One day, doll face, one day."
"You know," Will says after a moment, a long moment when silence was all that reigned in the room, "He did leave Newport because of you, babe. You know that. He left because you left him." He caresses Ryan's jaw with his fingers, slowly and almost lovingly. "I think there's something there. Something..." He sighs, shrugging as he does so. "I don't know. Call it queer's intuition or whatever, but I think there's something there."
Ryan swallows, thickly and with difficulty, before shrugging as well. "Whatever."
Will sighs and nods, knowing when not to push.
"Anyway," Ryan says, sitting down. He stretches, hands reaching for the ceiling.
Will sees all those muscles flexing and his cock reacts to the sight. However, as he checks his watch, he notices it's almost one and far too late for another round.
Oh, well, tomorrow will be another night.
"I gotta run, babe." Ryan leans over, giving Will a peck on the lips. A friendly kiss, the kind they always exchange whenever they meet in circumstances not Harbor related.
"I know."
Ryan reaches down for his pants as Will runs a finger down Ryan's back. He chuckles, looking over his shoulder to Will and blowing him a kiss.
"Tomorrow night."
Will grins. "I'll keep you to that, love."
Parking the car, Ryan turns off the engine. He walks out of the parking lot and toward the pool house. He pauses for a moment, staring at the door that leads to the kitchen.
He knows one day he'll get caught. He knows one day Kirsten and Sandy will come downstairs at the sound of the car being shut off and will find Ryan with tight pants and small t-shirts that are not his usual choice for clothing, and they'll have questions to be answered.
Ryan doesn't know if that'll be either good or bad.
One day, he'll have to come out -- literally -- and tell them the whole truth, something he never thought about when he was back in Chino.
Going to gay bars was more difficult back then, because there was the threat of someone spilling it and Ryan would have to face Arturo and Trey, and he didn't want that.
But here, it's easier, it's more relaxed. He can actually paint his fingers and toes and Will will applaud, as would the rest of his friends. Kids at Pacific and Harbor he knows, knows from other circles than school, of course. Kids he pretends not to know when they see each other at parties. Kids Ryan winks at and they grin back.
He sighs, running a hand through his hair as it falls into his eyes, gel already washed out with sweat.
He walks into the pool house and takes a quick shower to get rid of the smell of sex that lingers on him, on his clothes. He'll wash them later, the outfit, when Rosa isn't here and no one's watching.
Tired, more relaxed but tired nonetheless, Ryan lays down on his bed and closes his eyes, trying not to think about Seth.
The next day, book in hand, Ryan finishes his history homework, homework he had started, but not finished the night before. Maybe because his mind had been otherwise occupied.
There's a knock on the door before it opens, and Ryan looks up as Seth peaks his head inside. "Dude?"
Ryan closes the book as Seth walks into the pool house. "Hey."
"Homework?" Seth tilts his head and looks at the cover of the book before sighing. "Oh, crap. I forgot about it. You done with it?"
He nods, giving Seth the notebook. "Yeah, here. You can copy it."
Seth grins, almost bouncing on his seat. "Dude! Have I told you how much you rock, today? Because, really, you rock."
Ryan chuckles, ducking his head and he tells himself he's not blushing.
He swings his legs to the side, taking off his socks as he can feel his feet starting to burn from the early afternoon sun.
Ryan pulls the sock over his toes as he catches sight of the red fingernail polish and quickly, covering his feet with his hand, puts the sock back on. He had forgotten about the painted toes.
Looking over his shoulder, he sees Seth's eyeing the homework, completely oblivious to his close mistake. He sighs, putting on his shoes.
"Dude?"
Ryan turns around, looking at Seth stare at him. He bites the inside of his cheek to keep his manner cool, calm and collected.
Seth seems to frown for a moment before speaking. "Dude, you ok?"
Ryan nods, his eyebrow furrowing for a moment. "Yeah, why?"
Seth shrugs nonchalantly, picking at the cover of the notebook. "Nah, I don't know. You were kinda out of it today, this morning. In class, I mean."
Ryan looks down at his feet, plain back shoes and socks covering the nail polish Ryan has to remember to take off with acetone tonight. "I'm fine."
"You sure?"
Oh, honey, Ryan's mind whispers with an accent Ryan's familiar with, you have no idea. No idea at all, babe.
"Yeah," he says, his tone normal, unshaken, "sure."
"Ok."
They don't say anything for a moment, before Seth finally speaks up. "So," he says, standing up with a bounce, "ready for me to kick your ass?"
Ryan frowns, looking up at Seth. "I thought you'd go out with Summer." His throat is not horse, and his tone doesn't quiver. Ryan's very proud of himself.
"Nah, she's at a spa." Seth walks to the door, talking over his shoulder. "Come on! We'll order pizza and I can see you die with the Ninjas."
Standing up with a chuckle, Ryan follows, closing the door of the pool house after him.
He could have taken the easy road and told Seth everything a minute ago when he asked. But really, what was the fun in that?
Ryan's not telling, and they are not asking, so this is all good. For their own protection, not Ryan's. It's not that Ryan's afraid of their reaction. No, of course not, love. Of course.
It's better like this, more fun. More fun, Ryan tells himself. It's not like it hurt to see Seth with Summer, even after everything. It's not like it pains him because, really, it doesn't babe, does it? No, no, it doesn't.
Ryan swallows past the lump in his throat as he walks into the den.
They'll stay up late playing video games tonight, Ryan knows this. And he'll have to call Will to let him know he's not going to the bar, call Will when Seth's not looking.
Ryan doesn't care about that. He only cares about Seth's smile as they play video games and the way Seth seems to lean onto his shoulder, if only a little bit.
Besides, a girl's gotta have some secrets to herself.
Finished: March 7th, 2005.